the greatest feeling has to be getting over someone completely.
where you don't hate them, you can be around them, you can even have a conversation with them and finally be happy for their happiness.
we have wronged each other so many times that I forgot whose fault it was to begin with, but I know now that what has come out of it all was getting to know someone, and tonight I found out that whether its romantic or just friends, that that someone needs me.
I'm depressed. every day is tough, some days are tougher, and every now and then just thinking about another day cripples me.
I'm depressed but I've accepted it. it may have taken me years but im here now. yeah I'm sad but that's a part of me. I'm always thinking a million miles per hour and sometimes it just paralyzes me. instead of trying to cure myself, I need to find myself. that may take just sitting in bed and thinking some more or it may take a vacation, or road trip.
I wish I could look up, but instead of always looking down, I can at least look forward.
I've been trying to cure myself for so long because I never could accept who I am. I still haven't but I do know, you can't cure who you are.
I can't cure who I am. I have to accept it, and live with it. because life is the only option and I am who I am.
you're a distraction to my life. I have all these things I should be worried about but I worry about you the most. I don't worry in a bad way, but you consume my thoughts. and there's not a day where we aren't talking, how do you not get distracted by something like that? everything about you: your smile, your eyes, your voice, your laugh, the way you think you're an asshole but you have this side to you that's like a little kid, how you kiss me, how you play, your way with words. everything about you kills me, just knocks me the fuck out. and wherever my feelings go with this, it'll be worth it. you can crush me and it would be the best. you warned me and i haven't even tried to stay away, how could I? I'm so used to you, how could I stay away?
maybe you just want to watch a nice movie; in our underwear, in my bed, like many people do. or maybe you want me in my underwear and a tshirt just so you can pull my shirt over my head and kiss my neck and lay in bed with me straddling you and my hair all in my face, like the mess it always is. and then, I'll kiss you just once, and your hands will be in my hair, you'll push me over and straddle me and kiss me and touch me. and you know us...no self control. so you can let your imagination run wild about what happens next. here's a clue: we end up laying side by side breathless and maybe I'll kiss you and you'll kiss me. and surely I'll be a good host and put my tshirt and underwear back on and cook you food, like you see in movies. and when it's all said and done, maybe you'll fall in love with me.