I was born into the world not socially awkward but socially incontent.
I guess meaning that relationships dont matter to me. I dont need definitions in relationships or friendships nor do i think I need friendships.
my love life is shit. Why? Because if someone declares we are dating or friends with benefits I get this urge to back out.
and i do.
Its social anxiety, its the fear of people getting close to me? Its the idea of a relationship when i dont know how to have one? Its ridiculous and i can't explain it.
But its fucking terrifying because i have feelings, i love, and boy do i lust. The only way i act out? Just play hard to get and say no to any relationship. I'll just kiss you and pretend.
Those relationships have gone the best. And so what? If that's what i have to do to be content ill do it.